Everybody Loves Saturday Night

movies: wanted

Wanted is like a blind date. Maybe you were set up by a friend, or your mom, or something. You go into it with fairly low expectations, thinking of all the horror stories you've heard from friends and pop culture, but then . . . he's not that bad. You're actually getting along, in a friendly sort of way, with decent conversation and very few awkward pauses. He laughs at some of your jokes, you laugh at some of his. All in all, you're having a good time. This date? Does not suck.

That spark doesn't seem to quite be there, though. He's perfectly nice, fairly attractive, a few surprises up his sleeve. There are a few moments in which you think, "hmm, maybe there's something here..." but then two minutes later it's gone. It's nobody's fault, really. You're just not feeling it.

This is Wanted. Except fault can be found with the movie and methinks . . . it lies partly with direction, partly with script. Couldn't really buy James McAvoy as action man (he is awfully yummy, though, and I think he's fantastic otherwise. I say this just in case he stumbles upon this and thinks I hate him or something. I don't. You're lovely, very talented, charming, and you can call me anytime). Did like Angelina Jolie quite a bit, and I'm not ordinarily a fan. Can't help but like Morgan Freeman but felt the script cheated him a bit. Action scenes were for the most part fab, though near the end I found myself thinking, "yeah . . . this could end any time now." Not to point fingers or anything, because really, it wasn't a bad way to spend a couple hours and $12. I don't feel like I wasted my time or money. It was fun, you know? But I just wasn't feeling it.

it's here

movie: the incredible hulk

Yes, kids, it's true: my forecast for the truly awesome summer of movies hasn't panned out the way I thought it would, and The Incredible Hulk is the first movie I have seen in a theater since Iron Man -- not counting Reprise, the movie I fell asleep during. (Serves me right for trying to see an art house foreign film during the summer.) This should change with the coming weeks, what with WALL-E and Hellboy 2 and The Dark Knight, all of which I cannot wait to see. (Saw the trailer for Hellboy 2 last night, and it looks like the movie will kick some serious ass. Or at least be some serious fun.)

But anyway, to get back to The Incredible Hulk. My one-sentence review: It does not suck. Let me elaborate: it's actually not that bad. If you, like me, walked out on/turned off the Ang Lee travesty a few years back and are a little "once bitten twice shy" about going to see another movie version, I don't think you'll be too disappointed by this one. I mean, for one thing, the bar has been set incredibly low. I guess it's not saying much that this movie met my lowered expectations. I'm not saying you should run out and see it, either.

My primary objection to the movie was the overly cheesy dialog. I winced a lot. My secondary objection to the movie was the rather flimsy plot. To be honest, I didn't notice it so much because the cast works well together and there's a lot of action and a lot of pretty scenery. And Tim Roth is pretty cool. And there's a Lou Ferrigno cameo that I don't think half the audience noticed. And Ed Norton is . . . well, I like Ed Norton. I think he was a good choice to play Bruce Banner. For the first quarter of the movie I kept flashing back to Fight Club, though. Not that that's a bad thing, just a little distracting at times. Kept expecting Brad Pitt to show up.

There is also a Robert Downey, Jr. as Tony Stark appearance in the movie, as no doubt you know. It should perhaps be a rule that every movie include Robert Downey, Jr. in it from now on.

musical meme

I got this from here: the top five songs with "you" in the title. This is going to be harder than it looks, because the first few songs that came into my head aren't ones I would consider in my top five, but now of course I can't get them out of my head. And do words like "your," "you're" or "you've" count? (I would say the contractions count, but not "your.")

And seriously? These could all be Beatles songs. So to change it up a bit more, I'm not including any. Here's my list:

"I Got A Message For You" -- Robyn Hitchcock

"Not if You Were the Last Junkie on Earth" -- Dandy Warhols

"Pictures of You" -- The Cure

"Baby I Love You" -- Aretha Franklin

"On The Street Where You Live" -- Mr. Hudson & The Library

Honorable goofy mention: "If You're Into It" -- Flight of the Conchords

And now, the Top Five "You" Songs, Beatles Edition:

"You Can't Do That"

"I Want You (She's So Heavy)"

"You Never Give Me Your Money"

"I'm Looking Through You"

"Do You Want To Know A Secret"

(But really, "And Your Bird Can Sing" should be on this list, especially since it's in my Top Five All-Time Favorite Beatles Songs, Period list.)

this is gonna be riveting

Can we just replace "as" with "with"? And then "CPO Galen Tyrol" with "Aaron Douglas" (because frankly, Tyrol's kinda scary right now but Aaron Douglas could call me)? Kthx.

           

What New Battlestar Galactica character are you? created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as CPO Galen Tyrol You never wanted to be a glamorous Viper pilot.  You are happy knowing that without you to fix their birds, they cannot fly.  You fell in love with the wrong girl, but is that so wrong?  Maybe, but you don't really care.           CPO Galen Tyrol           100% Dr Gaius Baltar           81% Commander William Adama           69% Capt. Lee Adama (Apollo)           63% Lt. Sharon Valerii (Boomer)           63% Tom Zarek           50% Number 6           44% President Laura Roslin           44% Col. Saul Tigh           25% Lt. Kara Thrace (Starbuck)           13%

And now here's the first Flickr mosaic meme that went around, like, two months ago or something:

What is your first name? Michelle
What is your favorite food? cheese
What high school did you attend? St. Paul Academy (yes, F. Scott Fitzgerald went there. Got himself expelled, too.)
What is your favorite color? Purple
Who is your celebrity crush? Clive Owen (seriously. look at him.)
Favorite drink? martini (no surprise there.)
Dream vacation? Scotland
Favorite dessert? ice cream
What do you want to be when you grow up? superstar
What do you love most in life? honesty
One word to describe you. awesome
Your Flickr name. smartgrrrl (I fudged this one a little.)

dang, that was close

I was so hoping to title this post "i am iron man," but . . . oh well.

You are Spider-Man

Spider-Man 100% Green Lantern 80% Iron Man 80% Superman 75% Supergirl 75% Wonder Woman 65% Catwoman 60% Robin 58% Hulk 55% The Flash 50% Batman 30%

You are intelligent, witty, a bit geeky and have great power and responsibility.

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Quiz

Meh. Let's try the other side:

You are Mystique

Mystique 80% Dr. Doom 75% Apocalypse 67% Poison Ivy 66% Catwoman 58% Magneto 55% Lex Luthor 54% Mr. Freeze 53% Dark Phoenix 53% The Joker 51% Juggernaut 44% Kingpin 42% Venom 39% Riddler 39% Green Goblin 36% Two-Face 32%

Sometimes motherly, sometimes a beautiful companion, but most of the time a deceiving vixen.

Click here to take the Supervillain Personality Quiz

Excellent.

ten on tuesday

The week of memes continues . . .

10 Inventions That Have Made My Life Easier

I like that this list can include any invention ever from any time period.

1. The computer. I am of the age that remembers writing papers on manual typewriters. I thought the electric typewriter was the shit, back in the day. But truthfully? I still do a lot of writing longhand. I find it soothing. It also makes me think a little more clearly, for some reason.

This, by the way, was my first computer, which I got in 1992 (yes, about three years after it was introduced and two years after they stopped making them).

2. Email. I vividly remember being introduced to this concept, in the fall of 1989, by my MIT-attending friend who touted it as a way for us to "talk" without spending a fortune on long-distance phone bills. It took me forever to figure out how to sign up for an email account through my school, because no one else was doing it and the IT guys were really perplexed that I would even want one. "Why do you need it?" they asked. "So I can stay in touch with my friends who aren't here," I told them. It was a novel concept for them.

And because I did not get my own computer until 1992, I was using the school's computers in the library, which in my hazy memory look an awful lot like the computer from LOST.

3. The subway. Not only does it make my life easier, it saves me money and allows me to leave a smaller footprint on the earth.

4. Non-toxic silica-based crystals cat litter. Y'all, for reals. This is the best stuff EVER.

5. The Pill. I'm not on it anymore for health reasons, and let me tell you: I seriously miss the days of knowing exactly when my period was coming, not to mention the shorter duration of said period and the lessened aches and pains associated with it.

6. Washer/Dryer. Can you imagine not having them, whether in your home or in a laundromat? By extension, the concept of paying to have one's laundry done has made my life a hell of a lot easier, and is worth it.

7. The internet. 'nuff said, really.

8. Swift/Ball winder. Though I maintain that one should begin knitting/crochet life without them, just to more fully appreciate them once acquired.

9. ATMs. The less human contact I have, the better. No, I'm only kidding. But for sheer convenience? ATMs rule.

10. The lightbulb. I like ending on an obvious note.

the week of memes

You heard me. I've been trying to write for days now, but nothing is gelling. Things are either too personal or too ranty or too godawfulboring. So I'm turning to memes to at least have something to post every/almost every day. Gonna do this alllll week. Oh yeah.

Starting with the book meme on Flickr. It's like the one that everyone did last month, in which you answer a series of questions, look them up on Flickr, pick one picture from the first page and then use the mosaic maker from Big Huge Labs to create the . . . mosaic. But this one's for books:

The Q&A:

1. Favorite author: Jane Austen (this week, anyway)
2. Favorite book: Middlemarch
3. Favorite poem: "The Second Coming" -- and this picture is inspired by the poem, which is why I picked that over those with more religious overtones. I don't know if this is really my favorite-favorite poem, but it's the first one that came to mind. And it's true that "slouches toward Bethlehem to be born" gives me goosebumps every time I read/hear it.
4. Favorite genre: right. I read too much fiction to narrow it down, so I just put "Almost everything"...and then found a picture called "Almost everything."
5. Favorite non-fiction category: History. Of anything, really.
6. Favorite book as a child OR first book you remember from childhood: The Betsy-Tacy books by Maud Hart Lovelace. Read 'em all, all the way through Betsy's Wedding.
7. What book are you reading now: The Fourth Bear, by Jasper Fforde (it's ok. Not as good as the Thursday Next books, but a good bedtime read)
8. Favorite fictional character: Jeeves
9. Worst book you ever read: Robinson Crusoe. Holy crap on a pogo stick I never want to read that damn book ever again.
10. A book that changed your life: The Mill on the Floss
11. A movie that's BETTER than the book: Lord of the Rings. Nothing against the books, mind you, but remember when NO ONE thought these books were filmable? And then Peter Jackson goes out and not only does it, but does it in such a way that you can't read the books anymore without imagining the actors and scenery from the movies? And honestly, wouldn't you rather watch the movies again than read the books? I know I would.
12. The most disappointing movie adaptation from a book: Possession. At least, this is the one I can think of off the top of my head.

Also available here.

this can only end badly

So I'm reading through news headlines and find this:

Genetically modified mosquitoes . . . and that's as far as I got.

Not true: the whole headline is "Genetically modified mosquitoes may combat malaria." Still, can you blame me, a Minnesota girl, for stopping after the first three words and involuntarily shuddering?

Genetically modified bugs in general = bad idea. Does no one watch bad B-movies from the 50s anymore?

But genetically modified mosquitoes? Malaria, schmalaria. I mean, I am all for science.  Science rules (it works, bitches--scroll down). But this malaria thing is tricksy and I fear that for all science can do, something is going to go HIDEOUSLY WRONG.

And someone will--unintentionally, let's say--unleash mosquitoes the size of the Hindenburg on an unsuspecting public.

And those fuckers are coming for me. I just know it.

p.s.

Cucumbers: is there anything they can't do?

Not only are they delish, as has been previously discussed, when steeped in a nice martini glass full of Hendrick's gin . . . but they also really do work to eliminate puffy eyes.

For real. I had no idea. I thought it would just be soothing. That it would feel nice and refreshing.

But it really does work. I cut a thick cucumber slice, put it atop my left eye, and 10 minutes later the puffiness had all but disappeared. That was over two hours ago and I'm extremely pleased to say that both my eyes are back to normal.

Whew.